“Don’t put another dime in the jukebox (I Don’t Wanna Hear That Song No More)” by the Flirts: A song that should take its own advice.
Elkatross: An ungainly bird found only in captivity.
Finger food: No thank you, I’m a vegetarian.
Fish mapping: To diagram the paths of fish swimming in a tank, preferably using red lasers.
Karaography: Karaoke choreography.
Pre-traumatic Stress Disorder: The result of a pre-emptive strike.
Product may contain diary: So that’s why it gives me indigestion.
Raising a child: They’re heavy, but why would it take eighteen years?
Savory whipped cream: To go with pot pies.
The Exxon Mobil Art Department: The only way any university will get a shiny new fine arts building such as its School of Law has.
The smell of woodsmoke: There is such a thing as a time machine.