One potato and fifteen pinto beans

Men buying tampons are too easily explained. I prefer the dirt-covered hunter who stops in for soap, passing up Irish Spring and Lever 2000 for a bar of imported South of France Milled Soap with Organic Vegetable Oils, wrapped in silky paper with a cream flower border. The nun loading up a cube of Bud Light, three boxes of Sutter Home, and a pound of Starlight Mints. The frantic, aged-looking child purchasing twelve sourdough rolls, not wheat, and six slices of banana bread, not zucchini, for an unnamed taskmaster who directs him via cell phone. A $16.99 Super Cleanse Kit, plus a $1.99 jumbo bag of Cheesy Popcorn… hours vaporize into possibilities.

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